10 Ways to Be Happier When You’re Feeling Just Fine

Recently, I’ve been on a steady diet of books, podcasts, and documentaries related to happiness. This topic piqued my interest ever since I read about the field of positive psychology in Flourish by Martin Seligman (Check out this article based on his ideas).

Here’s what is great about exploring one topic through a variety of different channels: the same insights consistently show up across different people’s experiences. It’s validating. One such insight is that you can increase your happiness through intentional actions.

If you’re interested in being happier than you are right now, consider the following activities that seem to hold true for many:

1. Commit acts of kindness – whether it’s random or planned, take time out of your day to do something kind for someone else. This may be especially helpful if you’re feeling down on yourself since it takes the focus off you. It can also help you keep perspective, especially when you work with those who are in much tougher situations. In the Happy documentary, one individual increased his happiness through community service. His insight: “Life is a loan given by God and I have to pay it back with interest”.
2. Pursue intrinsic goals (personal growth, close connected relationships, community service) as opposed to extrinsic goals (money, image, status)
   • Spend more time with close family and friends. They will be with you until the end and particularly when times are tough.
   • Be what you want to be – it’s hard to be happy when you’re constantly trying to be what others want you to be. Even if you get there, you’ll most likely be disappointed. If you’re not sure what you want, take the Know What You Want online workshop (To take the course for free, email us referencing this article and we'll send you a sign-up code).
3. Add some variety to your life – whether it’s changing the music you typically listen to or taking a class on a topic foreign to you, varying your routine can revitalize your experience of the world.
4. Get some aerobic exercise – movement releases dopamine and other hormones related to your mood. It’s easy to understand and even easier to put off. The hardest part about getting exercise is to start, so don’t delay. Just put on your training shoes and get to the gym, or wherever you go for exercise. Getting ample sleep is another good way to quickly boost your mood.
5. Strive to get into flow more often – flow is what happens when you’re so absorbed in an activity that you lose track of time. People often report feeling better during and after being in flow. If you're not sure how to create the conditions to get into flow, check out this article.
6. Feel in control of your situation – when things aren’t going your way, it’s easy to blame others or the circumstances. This puts you at the whim of the universe, which can often lead to unhappiness. One way to address this dynamic is to take extreme ownership of everything that happens to you so you take back control of how you live your life.
7. Build up your resilience – resilience is the ability to recover quickly when unfortunate things happen to you. One method I’ve found helpful is to diversify your life cornerstones. If achieving your work goals is a major cornerstone for you, avoid other work-related cornerstones. Consider health, relationships, or other unrelated areas where you can invest your time and energy. This way if one area of your life is not going well, you can lean into the other areas.
8. Step off the hedonic treadmill – if you find yourself trying to keep up with others on material goods or prestige (for example: type of car, status of job or school, etc.), know that you can opt out of this dissatisfaction-inducing competition. There is no need to run a race that gets you nowhere.
9. Find ways to sincerely give thanks - focus on what you have versus what you don’t have. If you can read this article, you have something to be grateful for because it means you can read one of the most common languages in the world, have access to internet, and have free time to read. Think about 2-3 specific things you’re grateful for each day to increase your happiness.
10. See time as a gift that you can use or waste. In Tim Urban’s popular article, Your Life in Weeks, he broke up our lifespan by months and then by weeks to highlight that no matter how we slice it, our time is finite. Although this realization may seem morbid, my hope is that it will encourage you to make the most out of the limited time you have.

Harvard professor Daniel Gilbert's research shows that we tend to overestimate the intensity and duration of our emotional responses to good and bad events. The good feelings you think you’ll get when you hit the lottery, get promoted, or meet your soul mate is most likely short-lived. Conversely, the lows you might be feeling now because of a job loss, bad break-up, or health issue might fade much faster than you think.

No matter what your current mood might be, consider the actions above to increase your happiness. You might also want to take this Coursera class on the Science of Well-Being.

If you have any good books or other media on increasing happiness, please share it in the comments section.

Photo by Sebastián León Prado